Wedding Guidelines

 
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Guidelines

for the

Sacrament of

Holy Matrimony

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Duties of the Engaged Couple

“Have you never read how He who created them, when they first came to be, created them male and female; and how he said, ‘A man, therefore, will leave his father and mother and will cling to his wife, and the two will become one flesh?” (Mt. 19:4-6)  Marriage, then, is not a human invention but a divine institution. 

Many couples think that marriage is solely in their hands for the purpose of satisfying either their physical sexual needs or emotional needs of being loved and of loving.  A man and a woman share in the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony for no other purpose than one’s immortal soul encountering God.

 Consider the seriousness of the path you are about to embark upon.  If you believe that your sacramental union to your fiancι is a true calling from God Himself, then take seriously the guidelines presented here for the proper and holy preparation of not only your wedding day but also for the rest of your marriage and the life of the Church.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Process

Roman Catholic Church Requirements

Civil Requirements

 St. Mary Magdalen Parish Requirements

 

Process

 

  1. At the time the wedding date is booked, the couple meets with a member of the St. Mary Magdalen staff to receive the wedding guidelines, including information on church and civil requirements, music information, and the Agreement.

 

  1. Schedule an appointment with the priest or deacon who will witness the wedding vows to begin the process (preferably very soon after the wedding is booked but at least 6 months before the wedding).  This meeting should take place 1-2 weeks after the initial meeting.
    bullet Pre-Nuptial Inquiry begins the process of obtaining statistical information from the couple and confirms the wedding and rehearsal dates.
    bullet FOCCUS assessment is a tool used to assess areas in which the couple might need to focus in preparation for the Sacrament of Matrimony and life together as husband and wife and as parents.

 

  1. Schedule a marriage preparation program which is required by the Diocese of Lafayette.  More information about the choices listed below is given during this initial meeting.
bullet In Home Marriage Preparation
bullet Catholic Engaged Encounter
bullet Engaged Couple Conference
bullet Re-Marriage in Christ
bullet Re-Focus in Christ

 

  1. Begin Natural Family Planning classes.  These classes meet once a month over a 4 month period.

 

  1. Attend the marriage preparation program.

 

  1. Final meeting with the priest or deacon to choose readings for the liturgy and make final preparations for the wedding day

 

 

REQUIREMENTS

 

Pre-Nuptial Inquiry

bullet Paperwork which provides statistical information about the couple.
bullet Process which allows priest/deacon to investigate couple’s readiness to marry.

Marriage Preparation Programs

bullet In Home Marriage Preparation (preferred) is presented by a married couple to one engaged couple which allows the married couple to mentor an engaged couple to successfully begin marriage on a solid foundation.  There are six meetings in the home of the training couple.

 

bullet Catholic Engaged Encounter is a weekend experience designed to prepare each couple for their years of married life together.  The cost is $150.00 for both parties and includes lodging and meals for the weekend. A deposit of $75 is required with registration form sent in by the parish staff.  Registration is required at least one month prior to the weekend chosen by the couple.

 

bullet Engaged Couple Conference is a one day experience which is presented by trained married couples and a priest.  The cost is $60.00 and is paid at the time of registration, which is sent in by the parish staff.  Registration is required 3 months prior to the conference the couple chooses to attend.  

 
bullet Re-marriage in Christ is a one day experience specifically designed to give couples entering a second marriage the opportunity to address their needs which are unique, because one or both were previously married, and that former relationship ended with death or divorce.  Call the Office of Family Life for course availability.

 

bullet Re-Focus in Christ is a program specifically designed for couples seeking validation of their civil marriages or cohabitating couples with children.  Call the Office of Family Life for course availability.

 

 Natural Family Planning Class Series

bullet These classes are designed to completely familiarize the engaged couple with the principles and practices of Natural Family Planning.
bullet This four part class series extends over four months and is taught by certified Natural Family Planning teachers.
bullet Couples are encouraged to begin this class as early as possible in the marriage preparation

 

 Couples of Different Religious Backgrounds

bullet Permission from the competent authority is required for a Catholic to marry a baptized non-Catholic.
bullet The non-Catholic party is to be informed at an appropriate time about the promises which the Catholic party is to make, which includes that the Catholic party promises to live the Faith and to encourage baptism and education of the children according to the Roman Catholic traditions.
bullet Marriages involving only one Catholic party are celebrated outside of Mass.

Age

bullet Couples who are under the age of 18 must take marriage instructions from the Diocese of Lafayette.

 

Couples Living Together Before Sacramental Marriage

bullet The Church does not offer the option of a wedding Mass to the engaged couple if they are living together.
bullet The Church offers a Rite of Marriage Outside of Mass – Service of the Word with the Exchange of Consent before a priest or deacon and at least two witnesses.

 Ceremony

bullet Must take place in church.
bullet May take place on Friday evenings at 6:30 p.m. or 7:00 p.m. or on Saturdays from 10:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m.
bullet No weddings may take place on Sundays or during the Easter Triduum.
bullet Weddings are discouraged during Lent due to the penitential nature of the season and during Advent due to the preparatory nature of the season.  If a wedding is celebrated during Advent or Lent, simplicity in the ceremony and decorations should be observed.
bullet Couple will choose Scripture readings from the approved list in consultation with the officiant.  If a wedding is celebrated on certain solemnities, the readings of the day must be used.
bullet Sacred music will be chosen in conjunction with the parish music director.
bullet May be celebrated outside of Mass by a priest or deacon.
bullet Within the context of Mass, vows are witnessed by a priest or deacon.
bullet St. Mary Magdalen does not permit the use of the Unity Candle.  It is not part of the Roman Rite of Marriage.
bullet Members of the wedding party including the bride and groom must refrain from the consumption of alcohol or drugs prior to the wedding ceremony.  St. Mary Magdalen Parish reserves the right to prohibit participation of anyone who is under the influence of drugs or alcohol.

 
bullet In the case of the bride or groom, there is a serious question of one’s ability to give full consent to the wedding vows under such influence.
bullet If the bride or groom arrives under the influence of drugs or alcohol the wedding will be postponed to another date.

 Visiting Priests or Deacons

Marriages may be celebrated by visiting priests or deacons who are relatives or close personal friends of the bride or groom if the following requirements are met by the visiting cleric:

bullet Receives written permission from the Pastor of St. Mary Magdalen as soon as possible.
bullet If not assigned to ministry within this Diocese, must present to the pastor at least one month prior the wedding, the form utilized by that Diocese determining his status of incardination/service.
bullet If the priest or deacon is not from the State of Louisiana, must contact the Clerk of Court’s office to register for the marriage in this state.
bullet Secures and fills out all the necessary paperwork for wedding preparation.
bullet Abides by parish policies found in this booklet.
bullet Provides proper pre-marriage instruction for the couple.
bullet Conducts wedding rehearsal in conjunction with the St. Mary Magdalen wedding coordinator.
bullet Ensures that the necessary paperwork is delivered to the parish office at least two weeks prior to the date of the wedding.

 Documents Required:

Current Baptismal certificates (dated within six months – not originals) for bride & groom

bullet obtained from the church of baptism
bullet with notations of other sacraments
bullet with the church seal

Letter of Permission

bullet If neither the bride nor groom are parishioners of St. Mary Magdalen Parish, then a letter of permission from the proper pastor of the bride or groom is needed before the process of marriage preparation at St. Mary Magdalen can begin.

Marriage License

bullet Bring to the parish office after obtaining from the Clerk of Court.  The license must be in the parish office at least one week before the wedding.

The Wedding Liturgy Worksheet

bullet Complete the extra copy of the Wedding Liturgy Worksheet and bring to the parish office at least one week before the wedding.

Witnesses Required

Two witnesses (best man and maid of honor) are required.

  

Fees and Donations

      For Non-Parishioners

                  Church use                              $600

                  Wedding Coordinator             $  75

      For Parishioners

                  Wedding Coordinator             $  75

 Recommended donation to clergy

                        witnessing the marriage         $50-$100

 

CIVIL REQUIREMENTS

 

The State of Louisiana requires that a marriage license be obtained from the Clerk of Court’s office at the parish courthouse. 

Age

bullet In the State of Louisiana marriage is a civil contract.  To be able to enter into a contract an individual must have reached the age of majority, which is 18 years of age.
bullet If either party to the marriage is 16 or 17 years of age, parental consent is required in order to obtain a license.
bullet If either party is under the age of 16, a court order is required to obtain a license.

Documents Needed

bullet Certified copy of birth certificate for each party or a waiver signed by a judge (district or city) or justice of the peace
bullet Social Security numbers for each party
bullet Identification for whoever comes in to apply for the marriage license
bullet If either party was previously married, proof of how the marriage ended, i.e., divorce judgment or death certificate is required.

Waiting Period

bullet A 72 hour waiting period between the issuance of the license and the actual celebration of the ceremony must be observed.
bullet If the license is issued in less time than the 72 hour waiting period, then a waiver must be obtained by the couple.
bullet The marriage license is void after 30 days from the date of issuance and no authorized person shall perform a marriage between parties whose license has expired. 
bullet It is recommended that you apply for and receive your license two weeks before the actual date of your wedding.

 

Witnesses/Signatures

bullet Must be witnessed and license signed by at least two (2) witnesses.
bullet Witnesses must be at least 18 years of age.
bullet License is signed by the bride and groom and witnesses at the rehearsal.
bullet License is signed by the officiant (priest or deacon) on the day of the wedding.
bullet Original license is sent to the Clerk of Court by the parish office to be recorded.

 

ST. MARY MAGDALEN PARISH  REQUIREMENTS

The following information regarding the wedding ceremony and the celebration of the Sacrament of Marriage is to be of help in planning your special day.

 Sacrament of Penance

bullet All Catholics are urged to receive the Sacrament of Penance prior to their wedding day as preparation for marriage.
bullet Arrangements may be made with any priest.
bullet A good confession should be made as close to the wedding day as possible.

Liturgy of the Word

bullet The couple chooses scripture readings from the approved list in consultation with the officiant.  If the wedding takes place on certain solemnities, the readings of the day must be used.
bullet The couple chooses lectors to read sacred Scripture.
bullet Lectors should be individuals who are lectors in a Catholic Church parish and trained in the proclamation of the Word of God.
bullet Lectors should be dressed appropriately for the occasion; men in suit/tie and women modestly dressed.
bullet Gospel is always read by the deacon or priest.

 

bullet First Reading Choices from the Old Testament

1  Genesis 1:26-28,31a ……………….Creation of Man & Woman

2  Genesis 2:18-24 ……………………Two in One Flesh

3  Sirach 26:1-4, 13-16 ……………….A Really Good Wife

4  Genesis 24:48-51, 58-67 …………...Isaac Loved Rebekkah

5  Tobit 7:6-14 …………….………….God Joins You Together

6  Jeremiah 31:31-32a, 33-34a ……….Make a New Covenant

7  Tobit 8:4b-8 ………………………God Bring us to Old Age Together

8  Song of Songs 2:8-10, 14, 16a, 8:6-7a...Love is as Strong as Death

9.  Proverbs 31:10-13,19-20,30-31 …..Worthy Wife

bullet Responsorial Psalm; music is available for some selections.

Psalm 33:12, 18, 20-21, 22

Psalm 34:2-3, 4-5, 6-7, 8-9

Psalm 103: 1-2, 8, 13, 17-18a

Psalm 112: 1bc-2, 3-4, 5-7a, 7b-8, 9

Psalm 128: 1-2, 3, 4-5

Psalm 145:8-9, 10,15, 17-18

Psalm 148: 1-2, 3-4, 9-10, 11-13a, 13c-14a

bullet Second Reading  - Choices from New Testament

1  Romans 8:31b-35, 37-39 ……….Who Will Separate us from Christ’s Love

2  Romans 12:1-2, 9-18  OR 12:1-2, 9-13.……....Offer Your Bodies to God

3  I Corinthians 6:13c-15a, 17-20 ……..…..Body is a Temple of the Spirit

4  I Corinthians 12:31-13:8a ……….........Love is Patient

5  Ephesians 5:2a, 21-33 OR 5:2, 25-32 ….Mystery of Marriage

6  Colossians 3:12-17 ……………….…….Live in Love and Thanksgiving

7  I Peter 3:1-9 ……………………………Be of One Mind, Compassionate

8  I John 3:18-24 ……………………..….Love in Deed and Truth

9  I John 4:7-12 …………………………..God is Love and Lives in Us

10 Revelation 19:1, 5-9 …………………. A Wedding Feast

11 Romans15:1b-3a, 5-7, 13…………….. Welcome One Another

12 Philippians 4:4-9………………………God of Peace Be With You

13  Hebrews 13:1-4a, 5-6a ……………….Marriage Held in Honor by All

bullet Gospel 

1  Matthew 5:1-12a ……………………The Beatitudes

2  Matthew 5: 13-16 ………………….You are the Light of the World

3  Matthew 7:21, 24-29 OR 21:24-25 …The House Built on a Rock

4  Matthew 19:3-6 ……………………What God United, Man Not Divide

5  Matthew 22:35-40 ………………………Love, the Greatest Commandment

6  Mark 10:6-9 …………………………….Two Become One Body

7  John 2:1-11 ……………………………..Wedding at Cana

8  John 15:9-12 ……………………………Keep My Commandments

9  John 15:12-16 …………………………..Love One Another as I Loved You

10  John 17:20-26 OR 17:20-23 ……….May be Completely One

 

Wedding Coordinator

bullet Marguerite Landry serves as wedding coordinator for St. Mary Magdalen to assist couples with their special day. She can be contacted at 337-236-9131.
bullet The responsibilities of any outside professional wedding consultant cease at the door of church and are picked up again at the reception.
bullet She handles the rehearsal (or assists if the priest or deacon attends rehearsal).
bullet Sets up for the wedding.
bullet Assists with the procession at the beginning of the ceremony in collaboration with the musicians.  It is recommended that friends or relatives not help with the procession except the adult assigned to assist with the children who are in the procession.
bullet Removes all materials and flowers brought to church for the wedding including tapes and pins used on the pews, boxes, etc.; that are not removed by the florist. The large flower arrangements may be left in the sanctuary.
bullet Locks the church after the rehearsal and wedding ceremony.

Fee:   $75

bullet Due two weeks prior to the wedding date
bullet Make check payable to: Marguerite Landry
bullet Check may be sent to the parish office
bullet
 

 

Wedding Rehearsal

bullet Usually takes place within the week before the wedding.
bullet Rehearsals begin at 6:30 p.m. or 7:30 p.m. and all participants are encouraged to be on time and ready to begin.
bullet Members of the wedding party should act with dignity and dress appropriately.
bullet Will last approximately 45 minutes and does not include music practice.
bullet Members of the wedding party, including those reading at the ceremony should attend.
bullet For the wedding, attendants are seated in the front pews of the church.  The bride and groom will kneel and sit in front of the altar.

Flowers and Other Decor

Flowers form an important part of Church dιcor and celebration.  They also draw attention to the liturgical season.

bullet Furniture may not be removed or rearranged at any time by those decorating for the wedding.
bullet Florists ordinarily handle flowers for the sanctuary, bouquets, boutonniere and corsages, and any extra candelabrae.
bullet If candelabrae are used, chase candle tubes or globes must be used; open, uncovered candles are not allowed.
bullet Unity candles are not allowed.
bullet Fresh flower arrangements may be placed on pedestals in the sanctuary and/or in front of the pulpit.
bullet Flower arrangements may be placed on the Blessed Sacrament Altar.  These flower arrangements may be left on the altar after the wedding except during the season of Lent.  Any additional flowers or greenery must be removed following the ceremony.
bullet Flowers may be brought by the bride and groom to the Holy Family Altar at the end of the ceremony.
bullet If pew decorations are used they are to be attached to the pew with rubber bands, ribbons or plastic hooks (no tape, wire or tacks.)
bullet Aisle runners are not allowed.
bullet Use of rice inside or outside the church is not allowed.
bullet Because of the special nature of the Christmas season (from the week of Christmas until the Feast of the Baptism of the Lord in early January) and the Easter season (from Easter until Pentecost), St. Mary Magdalen Parish is solely responsible for decorating the church and no other decorators can add decorations at that time without specific consultation with a member of the St. Mary Magdalen Parish staff.  Small additions to the already existing Christmas and Easter decorations, such as pew bows and candelabra in the center aisle may be permitted but permission must be obtained.

 

Photography/Videography

bullet

The photographer/videographer is the recorder of the wedding, not part of the ceremony.

bullet Movement by the photographer/videographer should not distract from the ceremony.
bullet The photographer/videographer should not walk into the middle of the sanctuary or stand in the area behind the altar.
bullet The photographer/videographer should dress in a way appropriate to the occasion with reverence befitting the house of God.
bullet No extra lights are to be brought into the church.
bullet If extension cords are needed, the photographer and/or videographer are expected to provide them.
bullet All camera equipment, film packing, etc. are to be removed as soon as the ceremony is over.
bullet If there are any questions or confusions about this policy, the photographer/videographer should schedule a meeting with the deacon or priest.
bullet Should pictures be desired as a group before or after the ceremony, we ask out of respect for the Blessed Sacrament that NO pictures be taken in front of the Blessed Sacrament Altar (High Altar).
bullet During the reciting of vows and exchange of rings, we ask that no more than four or five picture be taken in the sanctuary area.
bullet If pictures are to be taken before or after the ceremony, other scheduled liturgical events must be considered and cannot be interfered with.
bullet Please note that funerals often need to be scheduled on the same day as weddings and advance notice is not possible.
bullet Furniture may not be removed or rearranged by the photographer/videographer.

 

Commemorative Wedding Certificate

            A commemorative wedding certificate with a small print of a watercolor painting of St. Mary Magdalen Church is available for a fee of $25.00.

 

Music for Your Wedding

Below is a basic summary of the steps involved in planning music for your wedding.

1. Read through the information provided.

2. Contact the parish organist, Tommy Guidry, before making any plans at all involving music or musicians. You should confirm Mr. Guidry at least five months before your wedding. Confirming means contacting him regarding availability and securing the date with payment in full or a $75 down payment. Should you choose to send $75, the balance will be due 90 days before the wedding.

3. If you wish to have guest musicians (vocalists, trumpeters, timpanists, violinists, etc.), Mr. Guidry will assist you in the booking process.

4. Select your instrumental music using this planner and the St. Mary Magdalen wedding C.D.

5. If you have a vocalist, consult with that person to select songs from the pre-approved list provided.

6. Complete the Your Music Selections sheet and mail it (601 Carriage Light Loop; Youngsville, LA  70592) or e-mail it to Mr. Guidry for final approval. Mr. Guidry will forward your selections to your guest musicians.

 

The Parish Music Director 

bullet Mr. Tommy Guidry is the Director of Music and parish organist.